Saturday, February 24, 2007
Random thoughts.
Feelings and thoughts are all messed up, so I'll just blah them out like that.
1. The feeling of being 'abandoned' is bad. Real bad. It's like being punched on the face real hard, and then another punch comes flying by when you least expect it.
2. I used to think that certain situations will turn out differently if things were done/prevented. But come to think of it, maybe some situations are inevitable even if something else is done/prevented in the first place. Some things just can't be stopped from happening.
3. Some things which used to excite me a lot (eg. stayovers, meetups) and make me real damn happy has no effect on me now. Not because I'm not satisfied with what things are. I want to be happy, but I just can't be. Oh man, what has gotten into me? I'm just going to be an old shrivelled and gloomy person. =(
4. I think from young, I have this mentality of measuring the kind of relationship I have with a person using the amount of money received in red packets. Like the closer you are with the person, the person will give you a bigger red packet. Lol, sounds so rude, but true. Anyway, I'm damn happy that I received 6 bucks red packet from my piano teacher (usually teachers only give 4), and Boonie's mum ( friend's parents usually gave 4 too). Jack's grandma gave me 12, while my mum only gives Jack 6. Lol. And I have this stingy aunt who only gives 2 bucks! Can you believe it! Who gives 2 bucks these days??
5. I'm itching for mahjong but can't find enough people. That feeling sucks too. GRRRRR! EFFF EFFF EFFF!
6. I get very pissed when people starts thinking that I'll neglect them because I have a boyfriend. Yes boyfriend is important, but friends are equally important to me. Maybe I'm a little more stuck up in the sense that sometimes I dont initiate meetups. And then people starts thinking I dont want to meet up because I have a boyfriend. -_-'''
Before any of these thoughts get too far, I guess I shall stop.
After so many changes, I hardly tell anyone about my random thoughts and feelings anymore. I guess I don't trust people that easily anymore. That is a strength, and also a weakness.
Oh man. I desperately want something to happen to me. =(
1. The feeling of being 'abandoned' is bad. Real bad. It's like being punched on the face real hard, and then another punch comes flying by when you least expect it.
2. I used to think that certain situations will turn out differently if things were done/prevented. But come to think of it, maybe some situations are inevitable even if something else is done/prevented in the first place. Some things just can't be stopped from happening.
3. Some things which used to excite me a lot (eg. stayovers, meetups) and make me real damn happy has no effect on me now. Not because I'm not satisfied with what things are. I want to be happy, but I just can't be. Oh man, what has gotten into me? I'm just going to be an old shrivelled and gloomy person. =(
4. I think from young, I have this mentality of measuring the kind of relationship I have with a person using the amount of money received in red packets. Like the closer you are with the person, the person will give you a bigger red packet. Lol, sounds so rude, but true. Anyway, I'm damn happy that I received 6 bucks red packet from my piano teacher (usually teachers only give 4), and Boonie's mum ( friend's parents usually gave 4 too). Jack's grandma gave me 12, while my mum only gives Jack 6. Lol. And I have this stingy aunt who only gives 2 bucks! Can you believe it! Who gives 2 bucks these days??
5. I'm itching for mahjong but can't find enough people. That feeling sucks too. GRRRRR! EFFF EFFF EFFF!
6. I get very pissed when people starts thinking that I'll neglect them because I have a boyfriend. Yes boyfriend is important, but friends are equally important to me. Maybe I'm a little more stuck up in the sense that sometimes I dont initiate meetups. And then people starts thinking I dont want to meet up because I have a boyfriend. -_-'''
Before any of these thoughts get too far, I guess I shall stop.
After so many changes, I hardly tell anyone about my random thoughts and feelings anymore. I guess I don't trust people that easily anymore. That is a strength, and also a weakness.
Oh man. I desperately want something to happen to me. =(
this heart of mine confessed at 2/24/2007 12:08:00 AM
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart